The Many Regrets of Hyuuga Hinata
by Midnight's Violet Haze
Summary: Drabbles of Hinata's failed relationships, not necessarily romantic, with various other characters. R&R Please. Chpt 5. Hanabi.
1. Prologue

_Prologue_

She sighed, lowering her gaze to the mirror below. She caught sight of the eyes of her reflection.

The white eyes, the Hyuuga eyes.

She swiped her hand against her image, causing it to disappear and ripples to take its place.

Pathetic.

That's what she was. Pathetic. Too shy and weak to do anything. All she was left with were regrets.


	2. Way Back When

**BTW: This is my first attempt at trying to be profound and though-provoking. Not to say that I haven't accomplished those qualities before in my writing, it's just I've never actually _tried _before, so hopefully this goes well.**

* * *

Way Back When

She remembered when they were younger.

Back when he didn't hate her with every fibre of his being.

_He's nice…_

_She's cute…_

Back when he didn't think destiny too cruel.

_I'll be friends with him…_

_I'll protect her…_

Back when they would play together. Train together. Talk together. Laugh together. Dream together.

_One day I'll make father proud_

_One day I'll be a powerful ninja_

Back when things changed.

_Niisan_

_Go away_

Back when there was venom. Fear. Glares. Hate.

_N-n-niis-san_

_Failure_

Back when there was fate.

_I am not a failure_

_I am a caged bird_

And she can't help but wonder if they could have changed everything with one simple glance. One smile. One touch. One word.

_Niisan_

_Hina-chan_

But it's too late for that because it is no longer way back when.

It is now.

Now there is no venom. No fear. No glares. No Hate.

No love.

_Hinata-sama_

_Neji-san_

Now there is nothing.

And she can't help but wish for way back when.

_I'll love you, forever and always_

_I'll love you, forever and always_

* * *

**AN: Although I went through a huge rant of how I hate authors that give up on stories and how I promised to finish all my multi-chap fics before starting to post, this what we in the biz call an exception (which basically means its alright that I'm a total hypocrite just because). This is a drabble so I will post when inspiration comes (meaning when I feel like it and probably there will be huge time gaps between posts) and I can only hope I'll actually get through most of the 'main' characters, though they aren't really all that main seeing as there are only 3 main main characters.**

**Please R&R!**

**Love,**

**HS**

**(serenaXyaten)**


	3. Snow

* * *

A blink of surprise.

_Kaa-san! The clouds are falling!_

Eyes focus on the tip of the nose.

_A gentle laugh. Na-chan, it's called snow._

Like in slow motion,

_A gasp._

A hand reaches up and brushes the soft skin.

_It's cold!_

Fingertips freeze.

_More laughter. Of course, that's what snow is._

A single snowflake.

_What snow is…? What is snow? What's it made out of?_

White,

_Hmm, let's see. A giggle escapes. It's made out of dreams and promises._

And whole,

_Really? Out of promises?_

And perfect.

_Really. So we should make a promise. Ne, na-chan?_

Fingers reach out…

_What kind of promise, kaa-san?_

…to graze the fallen piece of cloud.

_Let's start with something small._

Only to stop half-way.

_Can we promise to come out and play again tomorrow?_

Too late.

_Yes, we'll promise to come out and play again tomorrow._

It's gone. Melted. In the blink of an eye.

You were wrong kaa-san.

Snow is not made out of dreams or promises.

It's made out of clouds. Broken, fallen, pieces of cloud.

But it is cold.

**Umm, what can I say? It's a bit strange. And though it may seem like this would be more of a regret of Hinata's mother, it's kind of like Hinata regrets trusting her mother and believing in such foolish things. And she also regrets making that promise. It's kind of blaringly obvious what I'm implying, but you can always come up with your own theory on what happened.**

**Love,**

**HS**

**(serenaXyaten)**


	4. Pictures Can't Compare

**Hmm, it's been a while, huh? Anways, I do not own Naruto!!**

**This time: Hiashi**

* * *

Hinata glanced around the compound. Around the elegant, but painfully bare walls.

_Our home used to be filled with warmth. And pictures._

_But after that day, slowly, they started disappearing. _

_One_

_By_

_One_

_Until I was sure that it was a dream._

_Until I was sure that there were never any pictures in the first place._

_I'm ashamed to admit it, but I forgot a lot of things…_

She took a peek into her father's deserted bedroom. He was hardly ever in there.

Taking slow steps, she stealthily reached the bed and slipped her hand under the pillow.

Thin fingers delicately grasping worn material, she pulled out a mirror.

Or at least, at first glance it was a mirror.

_You took them down. _

_Every single one. _

_The only exception being the one in my hands._

_When I first found this, I finally understood._

_It hit me, this crystal clarity._

_You pushed me to be strong._

_You dressed me up in kimonos._

_You tried to grow my hair out._

_I was to be your doll. Your second chance._

_But I wasn't._

_I tripped and stumbled through my stances._

_I dirtied and ripped the expensive silks._

_My blue locks refused to lengthen._

_I failed you in every way._

_Now I am merely a mockery of the one I resemble so much._

_A pale version of a vivid spirit._

_After that I tried. I tried harder than I ever had before, but…_

_I am not strong._

_I am not graceful._

_I am not beautiful._

_I am not her._

_I tried, but I failed._

_I failed you again_

_Chichiue, gomenasai_

Hinata exited the room briskly, shutting the door soundly behind her.

She then left the premises, stopping only briefly to peer out the window at a homely little garden.

**RIP**

**Hyuuga Hikari**

**Ex-Anbu Captain**

**Beloved Wife and Mother**

_They say that pictures can't compare to the real thing. Sometimes the opposite is also true._

_It seems that a sunny place just isn't bright enough._

**I wish I could have kept up the play between past and present, but I couldn't make it work in this one. Maybe the next one will fit the pattern, maybe not. Wondering if the placement of 'ex-anbu' before 'wife and mother' is strange. I've never seen a real grave close up... I hope I never do too, but that's probably impossible**

**Coming up next: Hanabi!**

**Love,**

**HS**

**Midnight's Violet Haze**

_.Long.Live.Angst._


	5. Too Late For Sisters

**Another drabble after a looong break! Sorry, sorry, but I did say this would be inconsistent. **

**Anyways, I'm a little disappointed in this once, to be honest. I felt like it could have been great, but I couldn't get all of my ideas and thoughts out properly when I wrote it down, so there's a lot more that could have happened here. Still, I think it's not too too bad.**

**_ I've forgotten to label most of these with titles. Bad, Midnight, where's your writing etiquette?**

**Disclaimer: You know that popular anime and manga called Naruto? Yeah...it's not mine.**

**This time: Hanabi!**

* * *

Too Late For Sisters

Hinata is a ninja and, therefore, she has seen a lot of scary things.

She has seen a man drive a 5 foot sword through another man's gut.

She has seen a common thief make the leap to murderer by suffocating a small child.

She has seen her fellow ninja, her comrades; die around her on a mission.

There is little that Hinata hasn't seen and it has gotten to the point where very little unsettles her anymore, other than watching the light die in a pair of eyes.

However, one thing that has never failed to make her squirm is looking into Hyuuga Hanabi's eyes.

Her little sister, a whole 6 years younger than her, has the power to make her shudder with one look.

Growing up with the girl, Hinata cannot remember a single time when she smiled or frowned or displayed any human emotion.

Because Hyuuga Hanabi isn't human.

Sure, she's got all the mechanics and physical features of a human, but Hyuuga Hanabi is, just that, a Hyuuga. Hinata can't even think of her little sister without attaching the Hyuuga name because 'just Hanabi' doesn't exist.

While Hinata was busy being a failure and Neji was busy making Hiashi jealous by being a successful _branch_Hyuuga, Hyuuga Hanabi was born and was quickly thrust into extensive training to be the perfect heir.

She sleeps, she eats, she trains and she doesn't do much else.

While Hinata was out blushing and stuttering with her friends and Neji was out smirking and scoffing with his friends, Hyuuga Hanabi was training and training and doing more training with Hiashi.

Because Hinata was trying to improve herself, trying to catch Naruto's attention, trying to fix her relationship with Neji. Because Hinata forgot about her own little sister.

Hyuuga Hanabi is not a person, she is a Hyuuga.

So when Hyuuga Hanabi turns to Hinata after getting a 5 inch slash from a shurikin and quietly asks for a bandage without even the slightest glimpse of emotion, not even a wince, Hinata simply says "Third door on the left, topmost shelf" while doing anything to avoid eye contact.

Because the only thing scarier and more horrifying than watching the life bleed out of a glowing pair of eyes is to stare into a blank void of white that died at the moment of birth.

_Gomenasai, I have failed you as an onee-san._

* * *

**Hmm, I wonder how I wrote something so....morbid when I'm actually in an amazingly good mood today...**

**Thank you for reading and reviews would be nice!**

**With much love,**

**Midnight's Violet Haze**

**HS**


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